Copywriting UK | TENFOUR blog

TENFOUR’s been reading a lot about writing recently. As copywriters, it’s great to refresh ourselves every once in a while.

The most recent book was a cracker: Roy Peter Clark’s Writing Tools (see it on Amazon). Over 250 pages, he details 50 ‘essential strategies for writers’. Sounds serious, doesn’t it. But the book’s really well put together. And each tool is just a few pages long, so it’s the perfect public transport read.

To give you an example, Tool 20 covers the number of elements we include in any list we write. He talks about using one element for power (’the girl is smart’); two for comparison or contrast (’Tom and Jerry’); three for completeness (’beginning, middle and end’); and four or more to list, inventory, compile and expand (’that girl is smart, sweet, determined and neurotic’).

Think about it next time you use any number of listed elements in a sentence.

Clip from Tool 20:

“Tom Wolf once told Willian F. Buckley Jr. that if a writer wants the reader to think something is the absolute truth, the writer should render it in in the shortest possible sentence. Trust me.”

If you’re into any kind of writing, this book’s definitely worth a look. For sure.

Here’s a sentence TENFOUR came across just this morning:

The Board meeting, at which the organisation’s proposed approach, which was informed by the research, will be discussed, will take place in London on [date].

Blimey.

This evening, TENFOUR saw the perfect example of how the same news story can be reported so differently between papers.

First, the front page of London Lite:

Tube and bus fares will rise by up to 10 per cent in the new year, Boris Johnson announced today. The price of taking a bus with Oyster pay-as-you-go will increase by slightly more, from 90p to £1, in January.

Now the front page of The London Paper:

Tube and bus fares will soar by up to 10 per cent in a bid to plug a massive ‘budget black hole’, Boris Johnson announced today. The Mayor unveiled an inflation-busting package of rises… bus fares will jump from 90p to £1… The rises amount to an average 6 per cent hike across the network… more than the official 5 per cent rate of inflation.

Which do you think is the best write-up?

We’d argue that ’soar’, ‘hike’ and ‘inflation-busting’ are words that jump on the credit crunch bandwagon a little too eagerly. And TENFOUR thought London Lite was the more obvious tabloid sibling of the two freesheets.

‘She’s like a moose going after a cabbage’

Times Online quote from a story about new US Republican Party vice presidential nominee, Sarah Palin. Read the article>>

It’s been a while since we’ve done a word spot. So, just for you word spot fans: Original Source shampoos and shower ’smoothies’. Or shampoo and shower gel to the uninitiated.

TENFOUR likes the words on Original Source product packaging. ‘This shampoo probably has more nourishment than what you ate for lunch,’ says one bottle. Even better, the smoothie (shampoo) comes with a serving suggestion: ‘massage gently into wet skin to create a luxurious lather. Rinse then pat dry with a large fluffy towel’.

Firstly, we love idea of taking food into the shower… and we can now, without getting our baguette soggy in the process. Secondly, the words make you want to be back at home right away.

Most importantly though, we’d say that comparing products to healthy food is a clever, subtle-ish way to suggest they are full of natural, healthy stuff. Original Source is one of the only set of products in the supermarket that still carries the ‘not tested on animals’ message. So, are you going to tell us they aren’t made with real fruit, clouds and whatever else?